When to offer help

Okay as many of you know I’ve been stuck using a wheelchair for some time now. I won’t pretend it hasn’t had its challenges, but I’ve learned a lot in that time as well. I can go to the store on my own, in fact I can do most things for myself unless I’m just plain exhausted. While the chair is a necessity at least until my ankle gets fixed, I don’t want it to define me.

There are times I need help, not many but they do occur. Well I’m a well documented loud mouth (my husband and friends can attest to this), in short if I want or need your help you’ll know. I try to keep the fact that I’m in a wheelchair as out of the way as possible.

When do I ask for help?

  • Grocery shopping (trying to reach an item on a high shelf)
  • when I’m near exhaustion and climbing a ramp or going through a rough parking lot
  • When there is no ramp for me to use
  • Pumping gas

Other than times like this I do just fine.

What bugs me is seeing people run across parking lots or stores to open doors for me. Another really annoying thing is when someone just starts pushing me without asking, I mean really that’s just rude. Some people just see the chair, they don’t seem to think I have a brain or any ability to do things for myself. Well this is just not the case.

If I want or need something moved and you are around trust me I’ll make it known. There are times I just prefer to sit off to the side until there’s an opportune moment to do something else, no sense drawing attention to the chair or me. I get enough crazy looks, especially when I have a cat riding point on my lap. (Yes I can and have walked the cats from time to time.)

Now I’m more capable of handling things in the chair than on crutches (how do you carry a cup of hot coffee on crutches?) so I use the chair. I do not have nor do I intend at this time to get a handicapped parking permit, I can use the exercise.

In short don’t talk down to me, don’t ignore me, and rest assured if I want or need your help you’ll know it. My husband is the only one allowed to just start pushing my chair without permission so don’t even think about pushing me around.

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Another weekend rolling around

At some point last week, I decided it was time to stop letting my ankle surgery from keeping me down. It started with my husband David needing a new cover for his ACH (army helmet). So being the good army wife I was off to clothing and sales. (That’s the place on base where you buy uniforms and related items.) I got the cover and rank sewn on, nope they don’t use velcro on the helmets.  I then ran a few other errands, alone. This was something I had not attempted often since the surgery.

I even managed to cook dinner. I still avoid the stove top, since I don’t want to spill anything hot on my lap.

I will say I have gained a huge new perspective on life in a wheelchair. I am thankful that my stair in the chair is temporary, and I have the option to use crutches. I now have a glimpse into the lives of our wounded warriors. Just reaching items on the shelf at the grocery store can be a real challenge. I will say my arms have grown stronger due to my time in the chair.

All of this rolling around has caused a few plot bunnies to bounce around so I need to get back to pounding keys. Everyone just towers over me for now….

My hat’s off to all of our wounded warriors. You are true heroes.